Bob The Penguin Show
by Kai Hobbit and Sakura Elf
Summary: Well, we felt that BWOC desereved a Pencil Show spin-off! (We don't know if it's been done yet; Gomen if it has). Come, read, laugh at the insanity, and, last but not least, REVIEW! SEND IN YOUR QUESTIONS FOR LORI!!!
1. Introduction

I have a penguin, penguin ,penguin   
  
His name is Bob, Bob, Bob  
  
He's part of an angry mob, mob, mob  
  
He is weird, weird, weird, weird  
  
Just like me, me, me  
  
He likes to eat, eat, eat  
  
Dog feet, feet, feet  
  
And wear a thong, thong, thong  
  
Which is just wrong, wrong, wrong  
  
  
  
That's the Bob The Penguin Show theme song!  
  
My friend, Kai Hobbit and I are the hosts of this insane fic. Read her fic, The Carwen Show!  
  
Her muse, Fondue, and my muse NamelessEvilOne (NEO for short) work backstage. In this fic,  
  
we kidnap BWOC characters and force them to answer questions. Send in your questions!  
  
Thanks to:  
  
Hikaness-For writing The Pencil Show and inspiring us to write this and The Carwen Show.  
  
The Magical Association of Author Powers  
  
FF.net  
  
Insanity  
  
And of course you, the reader, that is if you review!  
  
  
Our first victim, uh, guest, is Merton J. Dingle!  
  
  
Kai's notes:  
  
By the way, folks, the first five verses of the theme will be used from now on.  
Oh, and this show is named after penguins because one by one they stole our sanity! And send in your question's today! 


	2. Merton and the Microphones of Doom

Fondue: Live from a small yacht in the Atlantic… it's Bob The Penguin Show!  
********************************  
I have a penguin! Penguin! Penguin!  
His name is Bob! Bob! Bob!   
He's part of an angry mob! Mob! Mob!  
He is weird! Weird! Weird!  
Just like me! Me! Me!  
**********************************  
Sakura: Hey, all people out there on ff.net! Well, now it's time for the much anticipated-  
Kai: *Cracks up*  
Sakura: KAI! *Smacks Kai over the head with the microphone* You're scaring the readers away!  
Kai: Sorry.   
Sakura: Anyways. Now it's time for the much-anticipated first episode of Bob The Penguin Show! Our first guest-  
Kai: *Air quotes at the word guest*  
Sakura: *Ignores her* is none other than Merton J. Dingle!  
Fondue and NEO: *Drag Merton out*   
Merton: Why am I on a boat in the middle of God-Knows Where? Who are you freaks?   
Kai: I'm Kai, that's Sakura *Points to Sakura*, my insufficient co-host *Gets whacked by Sakura's Microphone of Doom* OW!  
Sakura: You're here, Merton J. Dingle, because the authoresses want you to answer random questions asked by the reviewers.  
Merton: Um…okay…   
Kai: Our first three questions come from Star Child. Question #1: how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?  
  
Merton: If a wood-chuck *Could* chuck wood, does it really matter *How* much it could chuck?  
Sakura: He's got a point there.  
Kai: He's also got a dull. *Cheesy drum roll music plays*  
Sakura: *Smacks Kai with the Microphone of Doom*  
Kai: *Rubs head* Ow… um, anyways. Question #2: what does J stand for in Merton's name???  
  
Merton: If I'm going to be the one you address theses questions to, use second person. But the J stands for Jay.   
Kai and Sakura: -__-;;; It figures.  
Kai: And Star Child's third question: when is Merton going to ask out a girl who isn't trying to kill him??? (Like Lori?)  
Merton: Isn't that technically 4 questions?  
Kai: Umm… I guess it is…  
Sakura: Who *cares*? Just answer the questions!  
Merton: Those are questions that you should be asking the writers, Star Child, and not me. Besides, if I asked Lori out, she *would* try to kill me.   
Sakura: You got a point there. *Smacks Kai over the head with Microphone of Doom*  
Kai: OW! What was that for?  
Sakura: *Smacks Kai again*  
Kai: OW! What was *that* one for?  
Sakura: For not knowing what the last one was for.   
Kai: And what was the last one for?  
Sakura: So you wouldn't make another cheesy pun.   
Kai: -__-;;; It figures.   
Sakura: Well, our next three questions come from Tracy! Question #1: Do you like llamas?  
  
Merton: Llamas were used as a sacrifice by the ancient Mayans-  
Sakura: *Smacks Merton with the Microphone of Doom* Just answer the damn question.   
Merton: My, my, my! Has someone had their caffeine today?  
Sakura: *Evil glare*   
Merton: Eep! Um, sure, llamas are cool.   
Kai: *Who's been humming the theme to CSI all this time* All righty, then! Question #2: How do you like your eggs?  
  
Merton: Scrambled, with a light hint of Tabasco sauce…   
Kai: That's nice. *Whacks Sakura with *her* microphone*   
Sakura: OW! What was that for?  
Kai: Revenge.   
*They have a Microphones of Doom fight*  
Merton: *Observing* Don't get mad, get even…  
Kai and Sakura: *Resume the interrogating of Merton, as if nothing had happened*  
Kai: Allrighty then. And, question #3: Would you like to go to Pixieland, where pigs fly?  
  
Merton: If I can go there for FREE, yeah.   
Kai: TAKE ME TOO!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *Runs around, and ends up running off the yacht*  
Sakura: Okie-Dokie. The last question of the episode comes from the great, the almighty, sweet, beautiful,   
Merton: Egotistic? *Is rewarded by a smack with Sakura's Microphone of Doom*  
Sakura: Anyways…. Our last question comes from.. Me! What do you think about all the slash being written about you?  
Merton: Oh, the mental scarring! Oh, the therapy bills!   
Sakura: Why am I not surprised?  
Kai: Help…me…  
Sakura: *Throws rope over the side of the boat for Kai* Sorry, Merton, but we have to say bye-bye now. *Shoves Merton over the side of the yacht*  
Kai: *Now back on-board* Well, that's it for our rather sucky debut! Review and it'll get better…  
***********************************************************************  
Yeah… it was kinda sucky… But, well, review and it'll get better. Oh, and on a historical note, I made up the whole-Mayan-llama thing. (It sounded like something Merton would say…) Can't think of anything else to tell you, so I'll leave you with this: REVIEW!!!!!! 


End file.
